🕊️ Open Letter to A Critic
O critics, lend me your ears
this letter is in response to an anonymous review of my book Gunblaster Hyperborea
Dear Anonymous Critic,
I’m sorry you didn’t like my book. Thank you for reading it and buying it. I will use your money to buy something nice. I’d like to take a moment to tell you what I’m going to spend your money on. I was thinking of buying a monster energy drink so I can drink it while I write my next book. Before I start writing my next book I wanted to ask a few questions. First of all, how are you doing? Are you alright? You seemed pretty upset when you said my book belongs in the dump. Is that because you feel like you belong in the dump? I hope you know that you don’t have to live in the dump, or go to the opera either. You can choose to do neither of those things.
What I would like to tell you about today is something called “the middle path” it’s something I learned from reading about Buddhism. Basically, the trick is to recognize that just like up and down are connected to each other, good and bad are connected to each other, and what lies in the middle connecting them, is the middle path. That is where I try to live most of the time and I hope you will consider joining me there after you pack up and move out of the dump. Let me tell you, life is but a dream once you get out of the dump. I understand it’s convenient to live at the dump but you really start to appreciate life once you take your environment into consideration.
Once you’re out of the dump take a look around. Breathe the air. Maybe then you’ll finally realize you shouldn’t have said my book is “for babies” or compared it to Shakespeare. I’m trying not to take it personally, and I hope you won’t take it personally when I tell you the world is a beautiful place full of rivers, oceans, mountains, streams, and more. The world contains my book which I spent over 3 years writing day and night, I walked uphill both ways in the snow to finish that book and when I got my first proof copy in the mail I was content with my work.
I hope someday you too, will create something you are content to have made. Whether it’s because you felt like you said something true, something funny, something strange, something unique, or just the fact you completed it at all, I hope you will one day wake up out of the dump and fly into the sky like a dove. Thanks again for reading my book and for your money. Thank you also for providing feedback on my book, I will take it into account when I write something new. Although you said my book belongs in the dump, I wish you nothing but success and happiness.
Best,
I.A. McCauley
Keep on Keeping on 🌱